I am a Millennial, still in the Church... Now let me share why and what I struggle with....

First of, I am a 32 year old millennial born near the start of my generation.  I grew up half with Gen Xers, half with Millennials.  I am a woman.  I was raised on the Kansas prairie.  And I was a APK (associate pastor's kid).  I was raised in a Pentecostal church, interned at a Lutheran and an Evangelical Free Church, and have been Baptist since I got married, though I have Anglican and Catholic twinges. I am white. I consider myself a Goth, (Desert Gypsy Goth),  and a devoted Believer.  Why do I say all of this?  Because this does effect my views, as it is my story.

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1) Discipleship:  One of the major reasons I stayed with the faith is I was taught the faith and the core traditions not just by one teacher, but by many throughout the years.  But, I say I also sought out a mentor, or two throughout the years, as I believed firmly then as now what Bridget of Kildare stated, "One with out an Anam Cara (soul friend/mentor) wonders about as one without a head."

2:) My faith is personal and deep.  I did not go down the aisle to give my life to Christ, I was not prompted at some big event.  I gave my life to Jesus at the age of 4 1/2 alone in my room in the still of the night (ask me my story).  I felt called to the mission field while sitting be served enchiladas while 3 teens from my church told us grade schoolers about their resent trip to Mexico when I was just 7.   After a time of struggle, I chose to be baptized when I was 21.  Even after the untimely lose of my mother last year (and yes I did struggle for a bit), my faith got me through... 

3) Prayer is a Bedrock in my Life:  I started having daily prayer times when I was 13.  By 15, I often prayed "covered".  I have a prayer closet.  I seek to know my friends prayer request and really do take them to the Lord in prayer until such time as I know they are answered, thanks to my prayer journal.

4) I love Sacraments of the Faith - Baptism and Communion... I love to see my fellow believers take their stand of faith, and I love the sweet Communion with the Lord, His body and blood broken and shed for us.  It saddens me greatly, when I dont see these happening in a church.

5) I am Engaged, but I think Outside the Box:  I am a missionary, but I dont serve overseas.  I work with the underreached, unreached, and often ignored groups of Native America and the Subcultures.  I follow the key teachings of the faith, but how I engage the lost might just look different what your use to, at least in state side ministry ... (ask me more...if you wish).  And I have had mentors who have encouraged and walked beside me in this, realizing I dont march to the beat of the same drum...

6) Reverence for God's Word - The Bible:  I honestly love the Bible, with all its imperfect people, so in need of a Savior.  Yes, I have read it cover to cover a few times.  Yes I know there are alot of bad things that happened.  But I also see how God redeemed people out of that, as bad as things were, how much more can He from my own troubles and trails....  And YES I do believe it is Holy God's Written Word (literal translation of Diyin God Bizzad  aka Bible in  Navajo).

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Now, let me share some things that might surprise you. 

1) I hunger for deep teaching in church, I understand the need to reach the lost, but also what about those of us who need meat?  Discipleship/Mentoring, please, I beg of you... and just because I am a missionary, dont think I wouldnt love a woman of the faith to honestly walk beside me and to talk to and ask questions especially about being a christian wife... I am motherless, I dont have this guidence in my life.

2) If you are going to tell a story or share facts, do your research. Nothing turns listening ears off faster than Pastors and Teachers who get their basic history and Bible story facts wrong.  If you get that wrong, what else are you getting wrong???  If you make a mistake, and realize it, please be honest and if you can correct yourself.  It shows humility and honestly, and personally regains my attention and trust.

3) Dont be surprised when I know alot about Church history, some Greek and Hebrew, and might be able to point to places where assumptions have been made, not fact.  I want honesty when something is not known... not assumptions made.  I try to do the same thing....

4) Dont set me on the side lines, even if at first I have to clean bath rooms, also be teaching me and finding out my callings.  Help me get engaged in reaching the lost, the poor, the widows, reaching the world, and if I know of needs not being address please list (like the Apostles did when they learned of the Hellenist/Greek Widows not being cared for - 

5) I adore the hymns.  I adore some of the contemporary stuff.  I love to discover old songs of the faith not sung in years, and those like Be Thou My Vision which date back nearly 1500 years!  But I also like to experiment with style, and I even have some songs memorized.  That is I can sing them without the music sheet or hymnal, and without insterments too.  I also love the old church chants and high church music.  Please be open to using old and new....

6) Communion, Baptism, Reverence for the Word: These are important to me, VERY important.  I shutter when a church does not have Communion at least once a month, and feel deprived of a vital part of my faith. 

7) Community: Genuine community building, being honest friends, staying connected even when one is far away...after all this is the age of technology!  I have better connections with many in the Christian Goth community and those outside of the church, than friends from past churches...even though I try to stay connected.  Why is this?  (I honestly wish to know.)

8) Church Clicks:  Ok, adults.  We harp and harp and harp on our teens and kids not to do this.  Why are we doing it as adults in our churches?  I am so thankful for the churches that are not like this!  As a missionary, who comes back to churches off the field sometimes for a few months to a few years... this can be very hard to deal with.

9) Dont change the Truth to fit me!  Teach me the Truth, so that I might change!  It is sad when I see everyone but the church tightening up on what they believe, while those who have called themselves "little Christs" are not living and loving and holding to the Truth as He did.  Jesus was  and is Authentic.  Do we even know our own Bible, faith and church history enough to be authentic to it - - - especially to what Jesus taught us?

Those are what has kept me in the church... and what I struggle with.  I am just one Millennial, but if we all start speaking up... maybe we can help the church move forward, and at the same time stay strong in the core tenants of the Faith.  I pray that it is so!

~ Morria

Desert Gypsy Goth, Reawakens!

For those of you who have known me for years, the fact that I consider my self a Goth comes as no surprise.  True, I have alot of steampunk, southwest, dark mori, hippyish, tastes, but that is why I have since 2008 called my style "Desert Gypsy Goth".  Back in the day, I use to speak about being a Goth all the time to who ever would listen, especially the fact that I was/am a Christian Goth.  But to those of you who have met me in the last 5 year, you might suspect, but not be sure.  It is not really something I speak about to much, even though I do have a whole blog dedicated to my hobby of "Gothic Homesteading" and a facebook page to boot!

No, as I have grown older, I know who I am, and just dont care as much what other people say or think.  I know my faith in the Lord, I know my duel callings to the southwest and the "shadowlands", I know that my darker tastes in things are just who I am.  Goodness knows how many times I have tried to brighten up my wardrobe, to only end up back with 90% browns, grays, dark blues and blacks.  But then brown and black have been my favorite wardrobe colors since I was at least 10, though it slowly creeped in.  Basically what I am trying to say is, yes, this is the "Year of the Gypsy", but be sure I am and shall always be me.

~ Morria

PS: Happy World Goth Day (May 22nd)!

Disclaimer: I mean no offence to the Romani culture, I have blood family who is Romani, and they/we take pride in being Gypsy.  ~MMN

The Path comes into Light...

 Today was one of those days you will never forget, when you get a chance to live it. Today's whole service was on missions.  There was a prayer time before it, and I prayed for guidance, very clear guidance, for the path ahead for Robby and me... not even knowing the theme of the whole day. And what a day! Today the youth pastor at our church announced along with his family that they were on track to become international missionaries with SBC and be serving in Southeast Asia.   His wife is becoming a good friend, and I trust we have to to become closer before they leave at the end of the year.  At least, I have offered to help her in any way I can before they depart!

Not only did that happen, but at last I got clarity about the direction Robby and I are headed for ministry with Desert Refuge Ministry.   There were a few open doors, and Robby had been feeling lead towards one of them... Today, that was confirmed for me as well, as the Lord showed me it answered most, if not all, the callings we had felt, in one location/region.  So, from here, preparation begins.  How long will that take?  Only the Lord knows, but Robby doesn't finish school till fall.... so not before then.

~ Morria

Raining!

It is raining, and has off and on for the last few days!  My heart is so happy.  I have always loved the rain, but even more so after we moved to the desert.  To feel its cool wetness upon the skin, tis really a blessing from God!  I just love nights like tonight, when the rain comes, and everything is cool, damp, and beautiful again.  Tis truly a blessings to be enjoyed!

~ Morria

What path?

For so long it seems I have been unsure of the path...  not just the people or the place, but which path to take.  Tis not my faith that I question.  It is where this journey is taking us... or maybe that is the problem.  Maybe I have gotten so focused on getting where the journey is taking us, that I have forgotten to enjoy the journey.  Maybe I have forgotten that each day is a part of it, with its own lessons.  Maybe I have gotten so lost in trying to see the big picture, that I have forgotten to see everything around me and just live,  I feel like I have been waiting around for life to start once we get to where we're going, that I have forgotten to live now... maybe that is why I feel stuck in repeat.  Maybe I haven't learned to live in the now yet... to live each day's journey to the fullest.  And then see what tomorrow brings.  I think I will start that, Today!

~ Morria

Nothing for the Journey?

Luke 9:3, "Take nothing for the journey, no staff, nor bag, nor bread, nor money; and do not have two tunics." ~ ESV  That is a verse that has weighed heave on my soul since I was just 15.  I grew up with a hoarder, and every time I tried to downsize...  I was made to put stuff back.  Then I set out with my husband to start our new life... and we left with a duffle bag each and two backpacks to go on the bus.  Then we moved to and from Chicago with truck load of items.  Then from Kansas to Flagstaff to Thoreau with smaller truck load.  Then we took a uhall to Keavy, KY from Thoreau with all the stuff we had gathered.  Then we stored much of our stuff when we moved from Keavy to Farmington, NM.  When we came to Phoenix, we make 3 trips in 1 car.   I feel the weight of the items we have gathered.  I miss the lightness of the early days.... of that first trip as we just started out.

I know the "Gypsy Road", the path of a nomad, a traveler for the Lord, is not for everyone... and there are times I just want to throw in the towel and say I am done...but He picks me up and says, "For such a time as this..." and I keep going.  Yes we will settle down somewhat one day... and are semi-settled even now.  But that does not mean we should become to attached to things...  For we are all just passing through, and this earth is not our homes... Heaven is our true home, for all who believe!

~ Morria

Ashes to Ashes?

April 12th marks the 1 year mark for my Merami's memorial... and the end of my year of mourning, though I know I will still have to deal with her being gone from now till I myself die.  I think the thing I found the hardest is the fact that she was cremated.  I am not even going to touch the pros-cons or religious views of this, but I am dealing with a real issue.  I have no place to go to say good-byes.  No headstone, no grave... Yeah, sure her ashes are up on the mantle at Dad's place, by her picture (same one pictured here from the memorial)... but that is just not the same.

I am not against cremation, but I personal know when my Dad has passed (he has in his will to be cremated too), I am taking his and mom's ashes and burying them in a grave plot, placing a head stone, and having a place to visit, place flowers, and it be final.   Just like this gypsy gal is looking for her Travelers Rendezvous/permanent home till heaven... so do they need a final resting place.  I just hope I can live some where 29 plus years, as my parents did, and  my Dad still does...

~ Morria

Easter and Fresh Start...

He is Risen!

His Risen, Indeed!

Jesus is Alive, 

And He Lives Forevermore! 

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Today I laid everything down again...  It is fitting, it is Easter Sunday after all... it is so freeing to lay everything down in His hands... and just relax in the One who lives forever!  

In this week of struggle, when I have confronted my doubts, my fears, and came to realize no mater what my issue, I cannot deny that which I have heard, that which I have seen, and that which I have touched; God has been blessing me.

First it was the gypsy coin necklace... which I have been hunting for since Chicago.  Then it was the ivory lace kimono/duster.  Then ham and green beans for Easter diner.  Then a floor lamp with 3 lights and a dvd holder that matches our other one...  Everything we needed and some I just wanted...  Daddy Father, God, has been showering me with love when I needed it the most.  I am so blessed and loved.  "Thank you for saving this wandering Gypsy Gal! Amen!"

~ Morria

Travel and Me... and a Home!

Most people think I like to travel just because I call myself a gypsy.  While it is true that I adore the feeling of traveling down the open road, there is something I love and long for even more...A place to put down roots and call "HOME" for long term.  And that is Robby and my goal.  As soon as the lease here in Scottsdale expires... we are heading out one last time... and going to give every effort in our being to settle down in along term home.  Home sweet home...and a place I can wander out from...and always know is waiting for me to come back...that is what I dream of, long for, and greatly desire in life...

~ Morria

My Love and Me...

My love and me, 

Just us two,

Every true,

Side by Side,

Hand in Hand,

Heart in Heart,

Souls entwined,

Together dreams to share...

© 2015 MMN

~ Morria

Gypsy Soul

Gypsy soul, fettered down by world's cares,

Gypsy soul, battered & broken by pain,

Gypsy soul, tattered & seeking rest.

How long is this road before us?

How long till this path divides?

How long shall this trail be?

This Gypsy longs for a place of rest,

This Gypsy longs for a home to settle,

This Gypsy longs for His peace to remain.

© 2015 MMN

~ Morria

Itchy Feet!

We have been basically stationary for the last 6 months, and my feet are getting itchy to travel.  We have not been this stationary, in well... our whole marriage.  We were always on the road at least part time, raising support as missionaries, traveling to help family, traveling to the churches we worked in on the rez or elsewhere...
Now?  We are so settled it feels like my head is spinning.  This overly hot valley which houses the Phoenix metro is not a place I want to be stuck in for long.  Our lease is till October, so I will abide till then... Hopefully my health will hold out over the summer... as the 90 F it has been already this spring is doing a number on me already.

Maybe God is trying to teach me how to settle down.  How to be a good wife.  How to be a "Stay at Home Gypsy"...
All I know is I am climbing walls and restless trying to figure out who I am looks like in this new chapter that is beginning to open up... and I am not doing to well in the adjustment phase, as Robby can tell you.  Restless "Gypsy Gal" is not a happy "Gypsy Gal".  LOL.

Honestly though, I do think God is trying to teach me to be a good wife, homemaker, and to learn to be a gypsy without always being on the open road.

I don't know where the days and months ahead are leading me and Robby, only that we are on a grand new adventure... bumpy as it may be.
I don't know where this new "road" in life is going, only that the Journey-Giver has set it before us.
"Daddy, help me to be all that You wish for me, in this our new adventure! Amen."

~ Morria

Those who have gone before...

25 years ago, my Grandma Houser passed away,
22 years ago, my Grandpa Fitzpatrick passed away,
15 years ago, my Grandpa Houser passed away,
13 years ago, was the "Year of Sorrow",
10 years ago, my Grandma Fitzpatrick passed away,
7 years ago, Robby's Grandma Sylvania passed away.
3 years ago, my Aunt Nelda and Aunt Jewel passed away,
1 year ago, my Merami passed away.

In honor of them all, I share you this song that I wrote in 2000,
when Grandpa Houser passed away:

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Song of Sorrow

(set to the tune of "Barbra Allen")

From Irish halls to huts straw,

the wind of sorrow blows,

an’ everyone that hears its song,

knows of the cryin’. 

For in the heart an’ in the ear,

 the song it goes,

and sends each one

to bended knee

 for sorrow's prayer.

For sorrow’s course must take its hold,

and the joy its wing,

for in this life

they have their place,

an’ none can change it.

For in sorrows an’ joys,

this life its made,

an’ though we plead,

an’ though we beg,

this life it flies on.

So when the wind of sorrow comes,

we know our lot,

an’ turn our hearts

 to the Lord above,

our God and King!

For in His death

He bore our pain,

on sorrow’s tree,

an’ in Him we have our hope

for today.

So now, my friends,

ye’ve heard

the song of sorrow,

an’ to thee I bid ado

until the mor-row.


Copyright 2000 MMH/MMN

Ren. Faire Fun!

I took Robby to his first Ren. Faire today!  It was good to pull my old Monika of Rosenguard persona out of the trunk...as I have not used it in nearly 12 years... not that I havent gone to Ren Faires in that long, just not as my Monika persona, but my Morria an Rath Giolla one instead.  Nice change of pace.  Robby loved the faire, got himself a pirate hat, and now he is looking into pirate fests and mountain man rendezvouses, he liked the Ren Faire so much. LOL! Now at least he gets why I wanted to dress up for it, and next time he will go as a pirate so all is good...

The Arizona Renaissance Festival is one of the largest I have ever been to!  Much lager than the now closed Newman College Ren Faire, or the Great Plains Renaissance Festival (still going on), that I grew up going to in Wichita, KS. At first it was over whelming, but then it was a blast.  So many ideas both for crafting and for writing... and they even have a Celtic Cross near the Celtic Crafts and Village life area.  Perfect!  All in all, it was a blast, and for sure something Robby and I shall add to our adventures, if not yearly then quiet often.

~ Morria

Simplify, De-clutter, Rest...

After alot of years traveling, thinking, planning, I have ended up with alot of junk... some of it important, the rest of it just stuff that weighs down the journey.  Yet for the life of me, I cant seem to unload it... so it sits in unused piles, waiting for me to go through, hidden in boxes and behind closed doors.  This is not how I want life to be...

Yet, as the days go by, I am learning ways to curb the clutter. Simple tricks, easy decoration changes (that dont take much room to store), and printing art from the internet (free stuff you know?). Simple changes that can change the feeling of a place in just a moment...

~ Morria

Preparing For Lent...

Before I start, I want to say, I am not Catholic or any other of those traditions... I was raised in a Pentecostal home, interned as a Lutheran and Evangelical Free, and married a Baptist,... still I believe in fellowshiping with other believers, and my membership currently is Baptist...  All this to say, I have celebrated Lent since I was a teenager. ~ Morria

Lent, such a blessed time in my life. It is a period of fasting and prayer, spanning 40 weekdays from Ash Wednesday to Holy Saturday.  It is a time of quiet reflection, preparation, and devotion, in preparing the heart for the coming of Resurrection Sunday (Easter).  The 40 days of fasting and prayer are moddled afters Jesus 40 days in the wilderness.  For me, in the past 19 years, when ever I have practiced Lent, Easter has always had much deeper meaning for me...
This year I am giving up chocolate and Facebook games for Lent... and adding back Lent Devotions and Bible Journaling... pray for strength for me as Lent begins in just 2 days. 

~ Morria

Hikes and Valentines...

St. Valentine's Weekend is such a festive time for us!  Seeings as this year we live somewhere warm enough to do some fun outdoor adventuring, Robby and I hunted for a hiking trail not far away that "beginners", or re-beginners, could hike... Our goal, hike the Ringtail Trail to the Sunrise Trail junction, then return to the car.  We nearly made it, but turned around a wee bit shy of the goal, because Robby was not in the best shoes for the hike...new hiking shoes seem to be in order soon.  But it was a great start to our Valentine's weekend, as we got to see woodpeckers, lizards, and possibly and elf owl, but it was a wee bit to far out to tell for sure.  Some wild flowers were beginning to bloom, making it feel like spring.  In all, twas grand to be in God's creation, and not feel like we were in the city.

~ Morria

Windy Season...

The windy season is beginning to blow into the valley, and my soul is getting happy for it means spring is here.  The time of planting and rejoining the outside world for exploring and gathering is here again... a time of new beginnings and new life joining the world.  A time for fun...

It is a strange time for me as well... it is like the weight of 22 years has fallen off of me.  The last time the world has felt as it does now, I was 10 years old.  Looking back I wander, have I been fighting depression ever since then?  Has that been the burden I could not shake off?  It is as though the world is light and full of joy... as though hope is around every corner...

It makes me think of my childhood, of running through the forests of my Grandma Fitzpatrick's land... of the cross shaped tree, the fallen logs which we hid in, Deirdrea and I.  Of foot races, dreams, and plans, of laughter, stories, and adventures never forgotten.  And then coming in to her home and us three cousins sitting down to watch the Never Ending Story together (the only movie all 3 of us agreed on).  Yes, good times all...
If the future is even 1/2 as bright as those day were...even in the hardest of times, then things really will be looking up.

~ Morria

Childless...

I am barren.  This means I am childless, and most likely will be for all time (unless God steps in).  This has been a bitter pill to swallow, especially as all my gal friends start their families.  One of the things I have longed for the most in my life, was to be a mother, and to raise little ones of my own. I am overjoyed for them, and wish them and their little ones nothing but joy and blessings.  Yet, has made me face the facts head on, and come to place of peace and acceptance with them...


For a time I thought working with children in the Church would be a balm to my soul, but, alas, it only made the pain worse.  So, I have stepped down from work with children, at least under the age of middle school... It is not that I dont like to be around others children, working with them in a class long term is just torture.  For now, unless we adopt - which we need a home and more income first -, there will never be a Zahena Sylvaina, Zeke Patrick, Bryan Matthias, or Mahala Lillie in our lives...
And for once I can say, I am becoming okay with that... sure, it is a change in plans from what I had for 30+ years, but I am okay with it... as this journey goes along, we will just see where it takes us....

~ Morria

Figuring things out...

Sometimes I wish I knew more... Understood more... Could peace the puzzle that is life together better... Here I am 32, and sometimes I think I had a better grasp on life at 16 than I do now.  Then there are moments when I think I am beginning to glimpse  the path, only to have it disappear into the shadows again.  I thought I knew who I was when I was 13, when I was 16, when I was 19, when I was 25, but now at 32.... I can honestly say, this Gypsy Gal has no clue who she really is...  Am I the herbalist?  Am I the missionary? I am the wife, who dutifully aids her husband so that he can better provide for them?  Am I the scared girl, who has forgotten her way?  Or am I something more... that I have not quite figured out yet?

Dont get me wrong... I love the life I have lived thus far.  Yet, ever since last year... when my adopted mother died just after I was "stabbed in the back" by someone else I trusted... I have felt displaced, out of focus, not quite sure of the world.  It is not like I have not faced death over and over.  It is not like I have not dealt with betrayal before and come out alright... but this time it rocked me to my core.

I keep think I am coming out of it... I keep think I am getting better... only to find myself still in the dark cave still marveling at the light, but not quite ready to crawl all the way out yet.  Yeah, I may be closer to the opening than I was 6 months ago... but I am not out yet by any mean... "O, God, help me! I cant do this alone!"

~ Morria

Herbalist

My studies are going well.  Better than I expected.  At first, I was like, well Natural Health is here to stay, I have always been good at understanding it, yet, I just did not really realize how much God had built it into me as one of my great passion.  True, often in my stories there was an herbalist.  When I was younger at first it was a secondary character, and I was the warrior woman.  Then as I grew older that shifted, and instead of a warrior woman, I was the healer, the herbalist herself...

Then, I really grew up, and bought into what I was told, "You cant do that, not in the modern world."  I should have looked into it.  I should not have just listened to those who were ill informed on many issues.  It is a viable trade again, there is training for it, which now I am seeking, but with great time lost.  Yet, looking back I wonder... Would have I been as good at it at 19 as I am now at 32?  Would I have had the passion, the skill, the understanding?  Or would I have just been a childish dreamer back then?  I guess I shall never know, but the future is indeed brighter.   Soon, I shall be Morria the Herbalist, for that I am truly thankful.

~ Morria

What is going on?

What is really going on?  What in the world am I doing here?  Everything feels so odd... So out of place... So wrong.    If I am suppose to be in the place, how long and why?  Was it to refind myself?  I have done that (I think?).  Was to settle once and for all my heart is in Dine Bikeyah?  I have most diffenently learned that.  Was it for Rob to learn what he need to?  His doing that.   Now what?   How long till I get to return to New Mexico?  How long till we can settle down for good?   Or is there more crazy stuff first?  I am not sure how much longer my heart and soul can wait...

~ Morria

32nd Year...

So, as of 9:35AM, I am offically 32 years old/young, how ever you wish to see it!  LOL!  Some people dont count their years past 21 or 30, but for me, I soo do!  I guess my year of sorrow at 19 years old, taught me how each year we are given is a blessing from the Lord, and to treasure the moments and cherish those we love...for we don't know not how long we have!  I have been blessed with a good 31 years, and cant wait to make the best of my 32nd!  This year from where I now stand, seems to be shaping up to be the best in years, partly because of my view on it, partly because I will strive to make that way, and partly because of good things set to happen in 2015... Year of the Gypsy, here I come!

~ Morria

Dancing Again...

 Have you ever stopped doing something, either because you just forgot to do it or because where you lived it became impossible to do?  As time wore on, you vaguely remember the joy and happiness, the release and storytelling it brought to your life, the art and vibrancy it brought to your soul and your home... then one day, you began to look back on your life and wonder, "Where did the dancing go?"   I can even remember why I stopped.  Maybe Merami's clutter took up the dance floor (aka living room).  Maybe I moved away and didnt have a place to for a long time... Or maybe I just forgot how to let go and move to the music.  For what ever reason, stop it did.  And my heart got homesick for it...

Not an more!   Today dance has returned to my home... and I feel so alive... a piece of my soul is whole again.  Why I ever stopped, or if I just planned to rest from an injury or something, I will never know, but now I am go to make room for it in my days again.   I use to dance daily, if not more, and I was alive, vibrant, and me...  I stopped, and art slowly faded from my life...  Maybe as I dance, and my soul awakens... my drawing and other art will return as well...

~ Morria 

Rediscovery...

They say when you get older you know yourself better...  sadly that is not always true.  I think I knew more about who I was and where I was heading at 16 than I did at 21.  I hit the "real world" and thought, "Hey, I was a kid, I thought like one, I can't do any of that as an adult."  Well, I was wrong.
1) I wanted to be a missionary living out in Dine Bikeyah. - VERY Do able! 
2) I wanted to use and teach others to use herbs. - Working towards now!
3) I wanted to live off the land.  - Working towards our own homestead!


Why did I stop working towards those last two?  Because well meaning adults told me to grow up and join the "real world", you can survive and provide doing those.

So now the door swung open...  I can see clearly the path that was hiding just beneath the fog of lies.  I can be the woman God created me to be.  My love of Herbs, of the Natural world, of tending to others, and living off the land... they do have a place in the 21st Century.  I am not just some crazy dreamer.  I am the Desert Gypsy Goth/ Gypsy Goth Gal that I am suppose to be.  This backward look, for forward purpose, has been a true blessing... a journey of rediscovery of the Morria I have always been underneath...

~ Morria

Gypsy Gal's Song of Reflection

Be still, my wandering soul,

Rest, my gypsy feet,

Be at peace, my sojourning heart!

The Journey-Giver is with you,

The Story-Maker is your King,

The Refuge-Keeper is your God!

O, sing my soul!

O, dance my feet!

O, rejoice my heart!

Magnify His Holy Name!

© 2015 MMN  

~ Morria 

A New Year is Dawning! 2015!

A new year is upon us!  2015 has darkened our doors.  The old year of 2014 has passed, and the new year of 2015 has dawned.
May haps 2015 shall be brighter and more joyful than 2014 was?
Or may haps my way of looking at the trials that come my way, bidden and unbidden... has or will be be changing in 2015.  May be this is the year for new adventures and setting down the frame work to accomplish some big new dreams... mine and Robby's too.
Where ever it takes us, I know God goes with us!


New Year Goals - 2015

• Stay settled for ALL of 2015 (not including road trips) - Don't let the wanderlust uproot us before Rob graduates!
• Grow in God and be Engaged in His Word!
• Eat more healthily - more Eco-friendly, Naturally, & Organically.
• Let my walls down - Let myself be more of the free spirit that I caged inside!
• Let go of "stuff" - Find new ways to remember that dont weight down the journey!
• Re-learn to play my guitar!
• Find a bike I adore and get back onto the road around town!
• Start dancing again!  (Haven't really since 2007, and not a lot  since 2002...)

~ Morria