What path?

For so long it seems I have been unsure of the path...  not just the people or the place, but which path to take.  Tis not my faith that I question.  It is where this journey is taking us... or maybe that is the problem.  Maybe I have gotten so focused on getting where the journey is taking us, that I have forgotten to enjoy the journey.  Maybe I have forgotten that each day is a part of it, with its own lessons.  Maybe I have gotten so lost in trying to see the big picture, that I have forgotten to see everything around me and just live,  I feel like I have been waiting around for life to start once we get to where we're going, that I have forgotten to live now... maybe that is why I feel stuck in repeat.  Maybe I haven't learned to live in the now yet... to live each day's journey to the fullest.  And then see what tomorrow brings.  I think I will start that, Today!

~ Morria

Tattered Souls

Bitter sorrow and torment, we sent Thee to.

Suffering and pain were Thy lot,

Until by death You did part,

Then to life returned.

Why did You call these tatter souls Thine?

Why do You want us at Thy feast?

We who did betray You to Thy DEATH.

Why it is we do not know,

Yet here in the shadowlands,

Beside the old worn cross faith does come alive,

As Thy holy blood cleans this tattered soul.

© 2004 MMH/MMN

~ Morria

Dead to the World?

Mi corp i mort saol a an!  (My body is dead to the world.)

Life is so confusing... just when you think you can see what is going on it all changes.   God, I hand this mess over to you.  Just use me as You see fit.

I will be honest... I am struggling with my faith at the moment.   I do that off and on.   I get on a high with my faith then come down sometimes into the very darkest valleys so to speak.   It seem to be that this is just the storm before life falls in place.... WHO AM I TO KNOW????

Days change, people change, but not always as one would pray.  Why is nothing seeming to go as it should?   God why do You take so long?   This is trying to the soul... but that is the point isn't it?  Nothing worth fighting for comes easy?  RIGHT?

~ Morria

Journey to Michigan

For the first time in ages I can say life is truly good.   Everyone up here is soo accepting of people like me... mostly because there are soo many around here.  lol.

Oh yeah,  I am in Leslie MI.... not sure for how long... that kinda depends.... on a lot... but if the the
peace I have inside is true.... this will be home for a while.

For the first time since the year of sorrow.... everything in life just fits together... here I am totally honest and myself... I took a long walk last night before I had to get back to get some sleep for... and contemplated on deep things of the faith...  tis sooo crazy...I find myself returning to the things of the faith that I thought were totally dead to me.... hmmm.... strange... could it be that God brought me here now for this very season....

~ Morria

Trials...

Trials, tribulations, and persecution, ne’er before for the past nine months have I had so many and at the same time! I thought I knew a little about what it meant to be disliked, to be an outcast, to be sorrowful, but in the past nine months my world has turned over. I have lost 5 people (people from my church and in my family) and my dog to death. Of those, Samuel's death hit me the hardest. He had been my teacher, mentor, and friend; in truth, I counted him my "big brother". With his passing I learned to have faith in God no matter how hopeless things looked and to trust in Him even when every thing made no sense.

Then with my work, which I took because it was my dream job, (a nightmare, though I knew it not!), I have faced a boss that has no understanding of this area, of the costumers she “serves”, compassion on her workers. She pays no mind to the health of her employees even when she is told of doctor’s advice. On top of all that, she has turned on the few of us that are different for dressing “too different”, even though we have followed everything that the company has told us to do.

How much I have grown through these testing times. I am not the same person I was a year ago, for in truth then was I a girl and now am I a woman.

~ Morria

Birth of a Ministry

I think I shall begin ministering in the underground, among my fellow subculture folks.  I have started a web-ministry.  I am calling it "The Chalice".  I am so excited and so nervous about this... but my heart is fulling in this.  I am ready to give my life to this, if this be my full journey-task.  Or this may be for a season, but I will give it my all until there is nothing else to give, or God moves me from this path.

Jump

A ledge, the edge, is this the end I fear?

Knowing not what lies beneath or beyond,

shall I take this step and met my rocky fate

or is there a path unseen

waiting for my first step?

Oh, fateful step of faith,

what waits for me at first step?

Life or Death?

Hope or fear?

Joy or pain?

I know not, yet still,

journey this path I must. 

2002 - MMH/MMN

~ Morria

St. Patricks Day!

I have three favorite holidays (plus a few only a few know about), and today is one of them.  Christmas, Halloween, and St. Patrick's Day... not because of the wear'n of the green, the leprechauns, or the likes... no for the man, Patrick of Ireland, or Maewyn Succut Padriag to be exact.  He was the man who brought God's Word to my people, the Irish for the first time where it really took off.  Sure, a few had come before, and there were some believers among the slaves... but it was with Patrick that it took hold in the upper classes as well.   He was a man who was first a slave of the Irish people, found his freedom, then risked his life returning to them to share the Gospel... that is true love and faith... they could have killed him on the spot for being a runaway slave...

His witness, and becoming one of those whom he was sent to (no one remembers for sure where he came from, but everyone remembers him among the Irish)... so completely he called them his people... is inspiration for me...
"O, God,  might I be like that on my journey-task! Amen!"

~ Morria