Journey to Michigan

For the first time in ages I can say life is truly good.   Everyone up here is soo accepting of people like me... mostly because there are soo many around here.  lol.

Oh yeah,  I am in Leslie MI.... not sure for how long... that kinda depends.... on a lot... but if the the
peace I have inside is true.... this will be home for a while.

For the first time since the year of sorrow.... everything in life just fits together... here I am totally honest and myself... I took a long walk last night before I had to get back to get some sleep for... and contemplated on deep things of the faith...  tis sooo crazy...I find myself returning to the things of the faith that I thought were totally dead to me.... hmmm.... strange... could it be that God brought me here now for this very season....

~ Morria

Longings...

There is soo much I could be doing, soo much my life once held.   I need to learn how to lead in the battle no matter how week my physical body is... for this battle is not against flesh and bone, but against the things in the spiritual realm that stand against God.

I find my self more and more restless... though I am not well enough to work away from home.   I awake in the middle of the night (my time of the day---not my parents or I would be up more at night.) longing for more.   I use to be so focused.  I used to be so sure of where I was headed.   Where did that go?

"God, I beg of Thee, show me what path to walk... guide me.  Return understanding to me... that I might know the meanings to that which You are showing me.   I return again to Thy Word with faithfulness, as close as a human can know...anyway.   My King, teach Thy daughter what You want of her.  Show to her the journey-task.  Amen.† "

~ Morria

Good Mood...

I am trying to keep in a good mood...as most likely you can tell.  It is hard some days, for at times I only have enough energy to rest on the couch, read, and talk with friends.   God is helping me.  While I'll never understand why He allows this stuff to happen... I am kinda glad He did.

Nothing like a mystery illness to drive me into His Word and prayer... because that is all I have left to cling to in this life.  My possessions mean little, money means little... the things that matter: friends, family, the Lord, the journey-task.   Those are what in this life that make it matter...

~ Morria

Mistakes...

Mistakes!  I have messed up so bad... I am not sure the broken pieces can be put back together again after this.  Bev, Rayne, and others, they have tried to help... but I am not sure even He can piece me back together after this...  if I fade away then you shall know now why...

~ Morria

Things are finally looking up...

I am taking a course at my church in the School of Ministry.  And as well I am thinking of taking a course in Restaurant and Hotel Management... thinking towards traveling to New Orleans, maybe June 2004.   Yeah... my life is on the up swing.... I got everything in order with my King.   Iosa Criosta (Jesus Christ) is so good to me...

~ Morria

There is no little one...

There is no little one... or if there was one, I lost him/her very early.  There will be no little Kelly in my arms come 9 months from now. I am half relieved, half heartbroken...  I know that is bad of me... but a mother I truly wish to be.

Now to heal my broken soul and heart, and continue down this gypsy road...

~ Morria

Lay Me Down...

I have slipped back into depression... I have been boarder line for a few months... but I have crossed over now... *la sigh*... well life goes on whether I am depressed or no.
"Lay me down the cold, cold ground, I will stand, will stand my ground."  Once more I feel as if I have let some of my close friends down... I am such a mess... why do you people even care?

My life is a mess... and has been for ages...
I just hit the bottom... and GOD is now rebuilding me...
*la sigh*... should have let HIM sooner.
I have reasons to live... *la sigh*.. I just wish life was easier.

~ Morria