Masks

 Masks, so many of us wear them, feel forced to wear them, or are required to wear them to keep jobs, be at a church, work in a mission.  Yet, kids and teens so many times see right through them, whether we want them to or not.  Why do we wear them?  Do we really need them?  Or is it just our own pain that causes us to wear them...

 Personally, I wear mine when I have been hurt so deeply that I cannot see beyond the pain.  It is not that I want to put it on, but the wound is soo deep, and so hard to deal with that the mask is all that lets me keep going, so that I am not always asked what is going on beneath.  I take it off before a few that are trusted, and finally when healing begins the mask comes off for all.

As a Christian, I hate wearing a mask.  I know that I dont have everything in my life in place.  I know that I mess up more times that I can remember.  I know that my brothers and sisters in Christ mess up just as much as I do.  I wish we had places where we could be more open and honest.  I wish the Church could stand up and be that place of safty again for us... maybe it can, but first we all have to get brave and take off the masks and agree to be honest and loving... no matter what we see..  Can we?  Will we?  I pray so....

~ Morria

Broken Christmas Eve...

 Those one trusts can turn on you in a minute...
To night was suppose to be a time of reflection and focusing on Jesus. Tonight we were suppose to have tortilla soup and watch a "Christmas Story". Tonight was suppose to be a time of each opening a gift and just making the best of this Christmas season.  Instead, a "friend" the family had over turned on Robby.

I have never been so scared in my life.  I was called a "witch" yet again... by more than one person.  Yet, I rose above my fears, and with all my might shoved the guy off Robby.  He had his knee to Robby's throat, and if I hadn't have, there would be no Robby to celibate Christmas with this year or ever again... I am shaking so bad.  I cant stop crying off and on.  So close to losing everything...

As it stands, he has bad bruises, broken beyond repair glasses, and a bedroom door that we will sleep with locked until we move in late January/early February back to Dine Bikeyah.  These two gypsies have got to get to a safer place...  I just trust tomorrow can be redeemed and we can still have a wonderful last Christmas in Kentucky... even if Christmas Eve was a broken mess...

~ Morria

Trouble came and went...

I learned an important lesson in taking in fellow travelers, gypsies, and nomads this week.  An old friend, Rekker, whom I had not seen in some time... came through Didean this week... He thought he would come to my house and take over the safe haven... I had offered him shelter as an old friend.  But in less than a day he was causing trouble... first he hit on me, only to find out Robby and I are a couple.  Then he tried to take over running the safe house.  Then he had the nerve to start telling all of us how we were going to run Didean from then on... Thankfully Jo and the kids were out of town visiting friends for the week, or she would have tangled with him BIG time.


As it was, I had very cross words with him.  He had been told he could sleep on the floor in the living room with the mats and sleeping bags until something better could be found.  Instead, he ordered Robby out of his room, put in an air conditioner (which no one should have as the wiring in that room needs fixing, and will be worked on in 2 weeks), and invited a girl we dont know over.  That and he tried to get meds at the hospital, only to not want to wait the 5 hrs needed to get them (we later found out he abuses them).  Good riddance.  I am all for helping fellow gypies, travelers, and nomads, but they have to respect the house and the few rules we keep.  Rekker did not.  Farewell, I trust you find what you are looking for and some peace in your soul to go with it....

~ Morria

Broken Trust?

Why?  Trusted you!  You had changed... but in a moment things return to how they use to be... maybe worse... I let you close, you brake me.  I distance you, and we get better...  Maybe we are just not meant to be...

At least, after all that, you took me to see The Village.  At least that is one redeeming thing of today...

~ Morria